The Pitfall Of Shaming Yourself For Not Being The “Ideal” Salesperson

This is episode number 2233. Jill and I talk about how not to shame yourself for underperformance in your business, land business, or otherwise. This hit me like a ton of bricks. I believe some of our members are doing this because Jill was holding an extremely informative continuing education or advanced education class on her end of the business. It’s about how to communicate with sellers, how to engage them, and generally how to manage the return phone calls you receive after sending a mailer out. The message that was delivered during this is not incorrect. It’s amazing.

The message that was being delivered during that session is, “Listen to everybody. Find out where they’re coming from. Be an amazing salesperson, and you will make a ton of money.” I don’t believe that that’s necessarily everybody’s approach on Jill’s side of the business at all. I have a very separate take on it. What it can lead to is somebody sitting and saying, “I’m not Jill. I’m not going to be any good at this.” That’s terrible. You’re shaming yourself. Here’s how I handled sales for decades before Jill came into this, and times ten everything.

You were successful is the point.

I was successful. I was a version of success that was acceptable to me. It exceeded my financial requirement. “Do you want to sell your property or not? I offer you $22,000. I get it. You want $82,000, but I’m offering you $22,000 man-to-man. If you want to do the deal, we can get it done on Thursday.” That worked very well. I don’t know if it’ll work now. It probably would. I’d have to send some more mail out.

There’s a large percentage of that would sing to. I like that.

We’re doing the whole topic right now. Each day on the show, we answer a question from our Land Academy member Discord forum and take a deep dive into land-related topics by popular request.

Tara wrote, “This is my first deal, so be patient with me. I have a five-acre property in North Florida, high and dry, no flood zone, no serious regulations, and county-maintained dirt road frontage. It has an electric pole and a panel box, but the previous owners before the seller took the wires between. It has a septic, a well that needs a pump, and a concrete pad already there for a trailer or RV. The lot is mostly hardwood but has a cleared space. That’s being used for deer feeding and hunting.

Here are the numbers. The seller signed for $32,000. I visited the property, and I spoke with him. He was a good guy. It was a good area I would live in, surrounded mostly by country homes with woods and pasture land. It’s twelve minutes to a boat ramp and fifteen minutes to the nearest grocery store with a cute little downtown, like restaurants and social things. It is twenty minutes from Walmart. There are many springs in the area for recreation.

Lots in this area with identical size within a mile or so are going for between $45,000 and $62,000. It’s signed to buy for $32,000. Things are selling between $45,000 and $62,000 based on comps of the last twelve months. Some that are active right now. They are currently for sale. None of which has any utility. Is anyone open to giving any feedback?” I’m sure that teller is saying, “Am I spending too much money?” I say yes. Go.

If you think you’re spending too much money, you are.

I think that the fact that she put it in here and is asking for feedback, she’s looking for confirmation that “I think I’m spending too much money.”

If everything goes south, you’re going to make $10,000 on this deal. Is that okay with you? It’s not okay with me.

Everything could even go south and not make $10,000. That’s my point, too. Even though the current things are $45,000 to $62,000, what if you get in there and find out there is something? The market changes real quick. All of a sudden, everybody pivots. There’s another hurricane. Everybody leaves. I want to have a little more cushion than that $10,000.

How many times have you had this experience? “John, I love this truck. I’m going to come over and take a look at it, but it seems overpriced. I just wanted to have that conversation before I drive out there and take a look at it.” John’s response is this. “You don’t understand. This truck is one of a kind. It’s amazing.” He starts to justify. “It’s got a new stereo. The wheels that I put on it are amazing. The tires cost $1,200,” to which I’m saying in my head, “Yes, pal. That’s your problem. Congratulations, but it’s overpriced.”

Tara, I’m not picking on you. That’s what’s going on here. It’s got twelve minutes to the boat lock. We’ve got a poured pad. We’ve got a septic. The fact is, it’s overpriced. Here’s how I like to do real estate deals. I’m very confident I can sell this property, if everything goes wrong, for $45,000. To myself more than anybody, I’m willing to pay $15,000.

That works for me.

That’s it, seller. We can close on Thursday.

I wouldn’t tell them that. I’m not going to tell them the sales number or anything. I’ll just give them the last part. “Just to clarify, I hear you. I know you wanted $32,000. I’ve done a lot more work on this and looked into it a little bit deeper. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but my best price is $15,000.”

Since we’re talking about shame, and we will in a second here, how many times have you walked into a house? This happens with Jill and me because Jill is always shopping in neighborhoods that are four times what I would shop in if she weren’t around, quality-wise. You walk into a house.

It is because you just want the acceptable. You use that term loosely. It is acceptable to you.

I married up. Jill married down, by the way. My life is better because of her. She knows that I know that, but it doesn’t stop me from complaining about it.

All the time.

You walk into some highfalutin house. It’s $600,000 more than it should be. We know that because we’re in this business. Jill even knows that. There is the beehive hairdo real estate agent. I’d say, “This is $600,000 more than the house that’s sold next door.” “You don’t understand, little low-life person with denim, lumberjack.” What she’s saying is, “I’m not sure you should even be walking through this house at all.”

You don’t fit in.

The Importance Of “Buy Low, Sell Well, Don’t Reset The Market”

“You don’t understand. Come with me. I’ll show you why it’s $600,000. Do you see these faucets? These are Mueller faucets. Do you know what a Mueller is, sir?” You don’t want to be in that environment. You never want any type of sales environment to even approach that. If you want to be wealthy in this world, you want to buy low and sell high on everything.

Can I just throw in one more thing here when you sell? My whole mantra has been, “Buy low and sell well, but don’t reset the market.” That’s the thing. You taught me this. We like to be just under this $45,000 to $62,000. Here’s what’s going on, Tara. We want you to buy it for $15,000 and sell it for $43,000.

That’s what I want.

You’re the cheapest one, and you way doubled your money.

You have the best property. All the cool things about it are icing.

Do not buy for $32,000, sell for $90,000, and try to reset the market.

They’re not cake.

That’s going to be an uphill battle. It’s probably not going to work out.

Jill, you’re awesome.

Thank you. So are you.

This episode’s topic is how not to shame yourself in front of your wife, like I do every single episode.

This is going to be good. I am settling in for this one.

It is about how not to shame yourself for underperformance in your business. There’s always somebody who’s going to be better at what you do. There’s always going to be probably a lot more people worse than what you do. You don’t want to sacrifice your morals and scruples to make it some contest to be as amazing as Jill is on the phone buying and selling property. You want to find your zen and then adjust for it.

There’s always going to be someone better at what you do—and probably a lot more people who aren’t as good. But you don’t want to sacrifice your morals or scruples just to make it a contest. Share on X

If I were a brand new Land Academy member and I attended a continuing education class where Jill has ten or fifteen slides explaining how she creates real estate deals once people call back from a mailer, and step by step, how she does it, what she’s saying is she was a professional corporate salesperson her entire career long before we ever met each other. She was in real estate full time. It’s in her soul. It’s in her tissue about how to talk to sellers. I see it all the time in and out of our businesses.

You might say to yourself and shame yourself, “I can’t do that. I’m never going to learn how to do that. I’m not a corporate salesperson. I work at XYZ right now, and I’m trying to make $10,000 or $15,000 extra a month, so I can leave. I’m not Jill. This sucks. I suck.” I don’t want you to shame yourself like that. What I want you to do is say, “Hold on. How can I make this work for me?” I have a very brief conversation that goes something like this whenever they call back, “I’m interested in buying your lots over $22,000. That’s what it’s worth to me. I’m in the business of buying land from people who don’t necessarily want it or need it anymore, and just want to cash out quickly.”

It is a no-frills conversation. “I can make that happen for you by Thursday at $22,000. I do realize this is under value, and if you see the value in getting a deal done and getting that out of your life, I’m your person.” You can do that. That was my approach for years, and it worked. Does it work as well as Jill’s? No approach that I’ve ever seen works as good as Jill’s.

Embracing Your Unique Strengths & Not Striving For Perfection

We’re talking big picture in your business. One of the things that we have talked about a lot that most people identify with in the Land Academy world is, “Are you a Jack, or are you a Jill?” It’s easy to see the differences. It is very easy to spot the differences between us. He’s the numbers data guy, and I’m the “Get on the phone.” We got that. What we’re trying to say is figure out which one you are, know what is right or wrong, and dig in with what you’re good at. That’s it.

If you are not good at it, there are all kinds of tools and resources and other people you could bring in to help you in the areas that you’re not great at. I have never felt bad personally. I am proud to say I do not have a PhD in Excel. I can find my way around, but I’m not you. If I have to do some things, it takes me a minute to figure it out, but I can figure it out. Again, I’m not you, nor do I ever care to be.

I don’t feel bad. I am not embarrassed or anything because I’m not as zippy as you in Excel. It doesn’t matter. If you don’t have that, you shouldn’t feel like, “I can never do this. Watch Jack.” That’s the thing, too. I watch people go, “How do I get fast like Jack? Watch the functions he’s doing and the formulas he’s making. I’ve got to get to that point.” No, you don’t. So what? What is your special talent? Maybe your special talent is one thing, like raising capital. There’s nothing wrong with that.

That’s a great example. I’m the worst capital raiser on this planet, and I don’t care.

You know what Jack does. You know what I do. There are ten other parts of this business that you could be an expert at. All you have to do is figure out what it is and then be very loud about it. I’m sure there are 500 people in the Land Academy. There are a good number of people in that 500 who would love to have your talent in their business if you’re looking to partner up. It’s there.

Don’t shame yourself about it. That’s my point. The real problem is that we’re all raised this way. We’re raised to have a 4.0 grade point average when we graduate from high school. The fact is, I can get an A in a math class in ten seconds, but it’s going to take a lot more effort and energy in other subjects for me to do that. That’s the way the world is. You’re good at some stuff. You have an interest over here. You don’t have an interest over here. We’re only rewarded for perfection, which is silly. It sets you up to fail.

It’s not even a 4.0. Your minimum is a 4.5 or something.

Jill and I are Generation X. The generation before us, the Boomers, and the in-between generation, or something, had it worse. They were expected to be perfect. I don’t know what your situation is like. Our parents came down on us, “Why don’t you get a 4.0? It’s ridiculous. You’re not trying hard enough.” That’s so silly.

I didn’t have that.

Yes, because you got A’s.

I wasn’t a 4.0. I was a 3.85.

I was 3.2 or 3.4. I exited high school feeling like a dunce.

Do you know why? It is because I didn’t care about some stuff. It didn’t matter. I did fine.

We were shamed. I’m not complaining.

We’re still undoing that.

No, we’re not.

I am just kidding.

Everything turned out. The second I got out of high school and got into college, I realized, “Those people are geniuses. I’m probably not a genius, but I’m not like these people. I don’t know where the world’s going here.”

Everybody figured it out when they came up the A student, B student, or C student. You’re fine.

I’m saying all this because I don’t mind if you’re shaming yourself and lining yourself up next to Grant Cardone. If I stood next to Grant Cardone, that’s what he does. That’s what he expects out of himself. I expect out of myself what’s happening.

That’s good.

Join us in the next episode for more interesting land and house investment content. You are not alone in your real estate ambition. We’re Jack and Jill, information and inspiration to buy undervalued property.