How to Overcome Bad Situations (CFFL 553)

How to Overcome Bad Situations (CFFL 553)


Jack:                      Jack Butala with Jill Dewitt.

Jill:                          Hey there.

Jack:                      Welcome to our show today. In this episode, Jill and I talk about how to overcome bad situations. I’m looking forward to this, for a lot of reasons.

Jill:                          I can’t wait to hear why.

Jack:                      I’m looking forward to it, because I’m like a hot head from Detroit, and so I can make a bad situation out of anything good.

Jill:                          Yes you can.  And I can’t make a good situation out of anything bad.

Jack:                      I know, I know Darma. Let’s take a question posted by one of our members on the online community. It’s free.

Jill:                          It’s really good. Kristen P. asked, “Hi I looking for some advice on what to do in this situation. I sent out a mailer in the beginning of August to a few counties in Texas, and with my luck Hurricane Harvey hit those areas dead on. So I’m not sure what the best route is. I know the area will be restored within time; however, I am worried about buying these properties, and having an issue selling them due to others being concerned about the damage in the area and what not. What would you do in my situation? Thank you. Kristen.”

Jack:                      This has come up a lot recently, ’cause there’s a lot of hurricanes. It’s hurricane season. And Jill and I actually agree on this, it’s the one thing we agree one.

Jill:                          Yep.

Jack:                      As Ripley said in the movie Alien, “Nuke it for morbid.” I would not even answer the phone. I don’t believe in taking people when they’re down like this, and when people are looking for their photo albums, and stuff in a flood. You don’t want to be talking about a real estate deal.

Jill:                          Right.

Jack:                      And you don’t want to take advantage of people ever. Ever, ever, ever, so that’s what … I would send a mailer out to Utah or something.

Jill:                          Well what about this idea, Jack. Now that you are talking about it. I mean ’cause, so yeah A, we totally agree, which is, don’t try to take advantage of people now in this situation. Got it?

Jack:                      And you’re 100 percent correct Kristen P. you’re right, alright? But what it looks like to the rest of the world is that, you’re trying to screw somebody. So, and we know you’re not. You sent it out before the hurricane-

Jill:                          Well hold on a moment-

Jack:                      There’s no way you can explain your way out of that.

Jill:                          Well hold on a moment. Here’s my thoughts. Let me run this by you Jack. Here’s what I think, so she sent out these mailers. Let’s think, in August, so they got it in August, and they’ve been thinking about it, and now they’re gonna call her back saying, “Do you still want it? It’s under two feet of water.” Let’s talk about that for a second.

‘Cause that really maybe what’s going on. She’s made an offer, and she still wants the property. Does she say, “Now, I know I offered you a 1,000$ for that property. I don’t want it anymore, ’cause now I know it’s under two feet of water. I’m sorry, I can’t help you.” What about that scenario?

Jack:                      I mean you know what, this is kind of like how to overcome bad situations. It’s kinda like the show. There’s a lot of ways you can go here. I mean, you could pick up the phone, and if the person says exactly what you just said, “Do you still want it?” I guess I personally, as much as I hate talking on the phone, and hate talking to people and stuff … I think that you might want to just have a nice fireside chat with ’em, and say, “How are you doin’? Is everything cool?” And I don’t know …

Jill:                          Well here’s my thing. Okay so Kristen-

Jack:                      My gut is just to run away from this thing.

Jill:                          Okay so Kristen sent out all these offers, and people are now … Maybe they weren’t calling her then, but they’re sure calling her now going, “We need the money.” What about that? That could be a positive thing. Like, “You know what sweetheart, where is that letter?”

Jack:                      That’s what this show’s about.

Jill:                          “Where is that letter? Where’s that letter? That girl wanted to buy our property, it is a mess now. We need to sell it.” And she could be doing them a favor.

Jack:                      I guess if they’re calling, and leaving a message, or they’re saying, “Thanks, I really do need five grand right now-”

Jill:                          “Boy you couldn’t of come at a better time. Do you still want it?” ‘Cause this could all be positive, and it does tie into this show.

Jack:                      That’s the difference between you and me.

Jill:                          Here’s what I think-

Jack:                      You need to make everything positive.

Jill:                          Well-

Jack:                      And it’s why I adore you.

Jill:                          Thank you. Kristen, you could do it however you want. The bottom line is, don’t take advantage of people. That’s never the right way, number one. Number two, there could still be some assets in here, and if it’s all happened the right way, you feel good about buying the property. They feel good about selling the property. They’re actually properly telling you, “Hey it was a mess. Here’s what it looks like today.”

Just so they’re telling you what you’re buying, and you know what you’re buying, and everybody’s happy with it. You might be doing them a favor, and this could be a good thing. I might follow through Kristen.

Jack:                      There’s a lot of people in this world who love to prey on … To turn this question into a … And demonize Kristen for this. Even though you and I know, she didn’t do anything wrong at all.

Jill:                          No.

Jack:                      She can’t predict the future.

Jill:                          Exactly.

Jack:                      But people like in the media, and reporters, the Woodward and Bernstein’s of the world, they just love to … They’re a writer, or a reporter, and they need a headline. And I can see the headline now, “Kristen P. sends out mailers to kick people when they’re down, by trying to take advantage of people after Hurricane Harvey.”

Jill:                          Do we care what they say?

Jack:                      “Here’s all the evidence.”

Jill:                          But the evidence doesn’t happen-

Jack:                      I’m just telling you, that’s-

Jill:                          That’s enough to turn you away?

Jack:                      Yeah.

Jill:                          The potential?

Jack:                      Yeah, because there’s-

Jill:                          For real?

Jack:                      First of all, there’s a 150 million properties, literally. That’s a real number.

Jill:                          Alright.

Jack:                      In this country. We don’t need to just concentrate on the little hurricane-

Jill:                          So big deal, it was a couple hundred dollars on a mailer?

Jack:                      “Nuke it for morbid.” Move on, yep.

Jill:                          Oh okay.

Jack:                      That’s what I would do, but I know you, and you want to make a deal out of everything, and that’s really healthy. So, it’s just too easy to get-

Jill:                          What about case by case?

Jack:                      Case by case I guess. I mean, you’re gonna answer the phone anyway, right? Whether you send it out to Utah-

Jill:                          True.

Jack:                      Or anywhere. So, case by case, but-

Jill:                          I’d have a hard time. So here’s my thing, I would think I’m doing ’em a favor. I really would. If someone called me, maybe case by case Kristen. ‘Cause I would really think that someone might call me and go, “Oh my god, I can’t believe it. I really could use this 2,000$.”

Jack:                      You’re gonna get calls. You’re gonna get both kind-

Jill:                          Yeah.

Jack:                      I’ll tell you right now. You’re gonna get both calls. You’re gonna get, “How dare you?” Calls. Well you get those anyway, the hate.

Jill:                          But they’ve already got the mailer, ’cause it was in August.

Jack:                      And you’re gonna get calls like Jill just said, so it’s really your call. I personally, I think I would just say, “You know what? It’s not you seller. I just, I want you to know, this is not … I’m sorry.”

Jill:                          “I’d love to help you out, but I don’t want to be looking like I’m taking advantage of anybody-”

Jack:                      That’s right. That’s actually what I would say-

Jill:                          Kind of thing. That’s a tough one.

Jack:                      If you have a question, or you want to be on the show, reach out to either one of us on it’s kinda like we’re at a funeral right now-

Jill:                          Jack had to cut me, ’cause we can go on this forever. I don’t … ‘Cause there’s so many ways to look at it.

Jack:                      Come to our funeral today.

Jill:                          Yes.

Jack:                      Today’s topic, how to overcome bad situations.

Jill:                          Silly.

Jack:                      It’s the meat of the show.

Jill:                          You’re silly.

Jack:                      How do you do it Jill? I mean, ’cause you just walk around happy all the time.

Jill:                          You know, there are no bad situations. There’s only learning moments, I’m just kidding.

Jack:                      One of my buddies-

Jill:                          Could you imagine.

Jack:                      One of my buddies asked me this a year ago, we were all out having fun and stuff. Like couples fun.

Jill:                          Couples fun.

Jack:                      And he leans over, like no one can hear, and he says, “Is she really like that, all the time? Does she wake up happy, and does anything really get to her ever? This seems like a dream come true female.” And I’m like, “Dude, you have no idea. It sounds like a dream, but be careful what you wish for.” Jill could have fun … If we had five dollars, and we lived in Riverside-

Jill:                          And it’s date night!

Jack:                      We ate ramen noodles, I swear-

Jill:                          And our car doesn’t work.

Jack:                      Jill would make some positive thing out of it. I swear. I know you’re trying your best Jill.

Jill:                          I could just see us, our car doesn’t start, and we live in Riverside, and we have five dollars on date night. I could have fun with that. There would be a game involved.

Jack:                      I know.

Jill:                          We’d be having a picnic in the backyard.

Jack:                      Jill could make a game out of-

Jill:                          I did that.

Jack:                      The cardboard center of a toilet paper roll.

Jill:                          Dude.

Jack:                      I’m not joking.

Jill:                          I’ve done that.

Jack:                      I know.

Jill:                          There has been times when we didn’t have much, and I was trying to get through a little, and just trying to have fun. And I remember doing Subway sandwiches at the park, and having a picnic, and spreading out a blanket, and the kids thought this was the greatest thing.

Jack:                      I know.

Jill:                          Like, “Wow!.” This was awesome. They didn’t know it was a 20$ event. This was what we could do right now, and this was a long time ago, and they just wanted to do that every Thursday, “Why can’t we do this every Thursday?” I’m like, “Well that’s great.”

Jack:                      I remember that. I don’t know why I do.

Jill:                          Yeah.

Jack:                      And it was a long time ago Jill.

Jill:                          Mm-hmm (affirmative) exactly. So, you could do that. Alright so, how’d it come-

Jack:                      There was a time where no one was buying property, or selling property. For about two years, and that’s what Jill’s referring to. Fortunately we didn’t have any debt, and we didn’t borrow any money. So we got through it pretty well, but I remember that.

Jill:                          When Jack says “no one” he means that, there wasn’t a lot. It wasn’t like it was in the beginning. You could still unload property, but it was harder, longer, and it was cheaper, and thank goodness they were all paid for.

Jack:                      That’s right.

Jill:                          ‘Cause that’s how we roll.

Jack:                      That’s right.

Jill:                          So it was like, “Alright, we’re not getting double our money, we’re getting 50 percent, 75 percent. Dude I’m still making money, and we’re still okay-”

Jack:                      There wasn’t cash flying, let’s say.

Jill:                          And we had a lot of property-

Jack:                      Thousands of properties.

Jill:                          In the can there, so … I don’t know what the right term is-

Jack:                      Can’s good.

Jill:                          A can … So, there was-

Jack:                      Do you guys have any property left? We got some property in our can.

Jill:                          You’re silly.

Jack:                      What are you a movie producer now?

Jill:                          Oh my gosh … It worked … So, I was good at … Well that’s number one. My first thing, I was gonna define. Alright, let’s define what’s a bad situation. One is, nobody’s buying anything. Well that’s a bad situation. Number two, a deals gone really areye, that’s a bad situation. Number three, you have business issues. Your website crashed, an employee walked out-

Jack:                      I thought we were gonna talk about tailgating or something-

Jill:                          Oh no, that’s-

Jack:                      How do you overcome a bad tailgater?

Jill:                          Well that’s another bad situation.

Jack:                      That’s what I want to talk about.

Jill:                          We could talk about the-

Jack:                      After you’re done with the real estate thing, that’s what I’m gonna talk about.

Jill:                          Okay, money problems. That’s a bad situation. So there’s a lot of bad situations. Tailgating … A legal, you just got served, that’s a bad situation. I don’t know. I mean, dream it up. There are a lot of bad situations-

Jack:                      You married the wrong person.

Jill:                          That’s a bad situation.

Jack:                      You had three kids, and you really like two of em.

Jill:                          You’re getting audited, that’s a bad situation. There’s a lot of things that can be bad situations. You know, and I’m thinking, we’re joking on the big ones. There could be little bad situations like, “Doggone it, my car won’t start today.” It’s not the end of the world, that’s a bad situation a that moment.

Alright, so what do you do with all of these bad situations? Alright, this is gonna be a chill moment. But number one, is breath-

Jack:                      Oh my gosh, really?

Jill:                          Yes, stop it!

Jack:                      That’s your advice? Breath?

Jill:                          This is only … This is a three step process. Hang with me here.

Jack:                      I’m just saying what all the listeners are saying to themselves.

Jill:                          That’s fine.

Jack:                      That’s your advice, breath?

Jill:                          Well you know why? Here’s why. You need to take a step back, and really evaluate how bad this really is. Is it really gonna sink the ship? And you have to take a step … You gotta breath a moment. Don’t react yet. Take a step back. This is not a military thing, where you react first, think second. You need to think first-

Jack:                      That was gonna be my advice.

Jill:                          Well I know that, but this is not the military way to do this. So, hang with me here.

Jack:                      I am.

Jill:                          Okay. So this is not a fire, but you need to take a step back, and really evaluate it, to make a good decision. That’s why. If you react first on a lot of these, you might make the right decision, and we don’t want that. Number two-

Jack:                      You wrote stuff down for this.

Jill:                          I did write stuff down.

Jack:                      Wow.

Jill:                          So Jack’s looking the other way right now, and he just flung his head around to look at me going, “You have notes?”

Jack:                      There is nothing in our professional lives that Jill works on less, than this show.

Jill:                          You know why? ‘Cause this is fun for me. You know what I love? I love the ad lib, just let it flow, way we do this show for me-

Jack:                      There’re six listeners, that feel the same way-

Jill:                          Yeah they do-

Jack:                      They love our ad lib-

Jill:                          And now two. So anyway … Alright, then okay now we gotta access what this is. So, and then if we have a plan, great. Well you know what? Try to come up with a plan. That’s really step two. Try to come up with a plan, and get yourself out of this situation. Or at least figure out what you need to do. And then, be upfront and honest with everybody that’s involved.

You have to come clean. If it’s something you did, or even that you didn’t do, you have to tell everybody, “So this is what’s going on, everyone. And here’s what we’re gonna do about it.” And then number three, or I don’t know where I am in the steps, but do the right thing, even if it costs more. That’s my thing about bad situations.

Jack:                      That’s all good advice.

Jill:                          Thank you. Uh-oh here comes-

Jack:                      My buddy Das, who’s a fantastically successful home flipper-

Jill:                          The one who’s coming to visit us?

Jack:                      He’s Italian too, like I am. Yes, the one who’s gonna be here, probably today.

Jill:                          Mm-hmm (affirmative)

Jack:                      He has a saying, and he said it’s changed his life recently. It changes the quality of his relationship, let’s say that. He said, “Every time I get a little miffed about anything, I as myself this question, ‘Is this gonna matter in a year?’ ” And he’s like, “Now I’m just a happy person. ‘Cause nothing’s gonna matter.” Stuff that you really get upset about, it just doesn’t matter, really.

There’s a few things that you should get upset about, my kid’s failing math. That’s actually, you gotta do something about that. But, outside of some real serious health issues and stuff-

Jill:                          But you have help.

Jack:                      I mean yeah there’s not … Not that it doesn’t matter-

Jill:                          Get him a tutor, solve the problem.

Jack:                      I looked at, for whatever reason, I look at the best seller list books all the time. And one of the books that’s number six right now-

Jill:                          G-rating.

Jack:                      Yeah. The title is this, “How To Not Give A F”

Jill:                          Yeah.

Jack:                      “The Art Of Not Giving An F” You know what I’m saying, and I really believe that. The older I get, I’m like, “You know what? Who cares? Who cares who the president is.” Just don’t care.

Jill:                          Mm-hmm (affirmative) ’cause all these things are in place to make sure they don’t go crazy rogue. No matter who it is.

Jack:                      Right.

Jill:                          So, I like that.

Jack:                      Overcoming bad situations is a personal thing … I have struggled with this, and not so much last few years, but my whole life, because I’m an Italian hot head from Detroit. And people piss me off. Oh, I can’t say that word … People make me mad, and for most of my life I’ve really reacted strongly to it, and it’s gotten me nowhere. Quite honestly.

All it does it get me mad. It agitates, and aggravates the person that really doesn’t even know they’re tailgating, ’cause that’s how stupid they are. It’s just you know what? You gotta laugh, and walk away, and what I’ve learned recently is there’s huge power in silence.

Jill:                          Mm-hmm (affirmative)

Jack:                      If somebody’s messing with you, if you sit there quietly and just look at ’em like, “You’re the biggest idiot on the planet.” It’s gonna stop, nine times out of ten.

Jill:                          You know what I do? I have a mantra in my head for those things. Really bad people, and stuff like that, and the tailgaters. I usually-

Jack:                      Welcome to our family discussion listeners.

Jill:                          Yes, you like this? … I go,”What is wrong in their world? That they are so mad about this cashier taking 10 minutes … ” Not even 10 minutes, two minutes, because they had to get ones in their cash drawer. You know what I mean? There’s always that person in line, and I’m like, “Why are they so upset? What’s going on bad with them?” And I just try to stay away from ’em-

Jack:                      What’s the sentence you say?

Jill:                          It’s like, “What is going on in their world, that they are this unhappy about this silly, little, tiny … ”

Jack:                      How many times a day do you say that about me?

Jill:                          20 … Do you know what’s so funny? I gotta tell you something, this is so good. So where we live there’s a front door, and a back door. And we’re real close to the water. So we often leave the whole house open, and just let the breeze flow through. Well, the back door, if you don’t put the stopper there, it’ll close by itself. And it’ll like slam. So half the time I don’t know if it’s the breeze-

Jack:                      Or if it’s me?

Jill:                          Or if it’s Jack! So I just-

Jack:                      You know what?

Jill:                          I just ignore it. I’m like, “Well, it’s one or the other.” And I don’t do anything.

Jack:                      That’s great. I think it’s outstanding. “What’s he mad about now?”

Jill:                          There’s times that the doors slams, and I’m like, “Uh-oh, what happened?” Kind of thing, and like, “Oh it was the breeze. It wasn’t Jack.” But that’s what I use as mantra. I’m like, “Well, whatever it is, I’m staying out of the way.” And it could be something silly, and little like a tech issue, or a website issue, and it’s nothing to do with me-

Jack:                      Oh never.

Jill:                          So thank you, and I just kinda stay out of the way.

Jack:                      I never get mad at your, or the kids. I get mad at situations-

Jill:                          Yeah.

Jack:                      But I never get mad at you Jill.

Jill:                          Thank you. You know it’s hard for some people, and it’s hard for me. It’s hard not to take on other people’s things. You gotta be careful of that. ‘Cause if you get upset, then I’m gonna get upset, and I have to go, “Nope, nope, that’s not your thing. Let him handle it. It’s his thing, back off.”

Jack:                      But we’re really fortunate right now. The people who work for us, we have the best group of people I’ve ever had, since the ’90s. As employees.

Jill:                          We do.

Jack:                      They seem to solve their own problems, or at least they hide them from us really well.

Jill:                          They do.

Jack:                      Either way that’s fine with me.

Jill:                          Exactly. That’s awesome-

Jack:                      Let’s bring this back to real estate-

Jill:                          Nope, nobody saw that, good.

Jack:                      Bring this back to real estate a little bit.

Jill:                          Okay, so bad situations.

Jack:                      So no matter what we all-

Jill:                          Expect too much-

Jack:                      What we’re all about her, is sending blind offers out to property owners. All property owner types, for less than the properties worth. And I’m here to tell you, that really upsets a few people.

Jill:                          Yeah, there’s a bad situation.

Jack:                      Who the heck are you … Who do you think you are that you’re gonna send me an offer for my piece of property, that’s worth 1.5 million dollars, for 1.2?

Jill:                          Right.

Jack:                      And you know what? They’re right.

Jill:                          And that’s okay.

Jack:                      And here’s how I explain it, when I actually do talk to them. When it gets that bad. I have this thing, stuff gets to me, it gets to my desk. It’s either really bad, or really good. And so, every once in a while, there’s somebody that just won’t stop. And so I call ’em and I say this, “Listen, I sent you an offer for 1.2, and I know your property’s worth 1.5, and you clearly don’t want to sell it.”

We call it the Haight in the office. H-A-I-G-H-T. Like Haight Ashbury. So, this is the business that we’re in, truthfully. This is the business we’re in, and I’ve got six signed offers from the same mailing, from people that are your neighbors by the way. Who are selling me their property for 1.2 million bucks. Yeah, it’s worth 1.5, get over it man.

And what Jill said, what … And that’s what I say. You need to ask yourself what’s wrong in your life, that you’re so angry. That this little piece of paper, that you really should of just thrown away, like everybody else that got it. This is sending you to the moon, and that makes them stop.

Jill:                          It’s them, and it’s not you. And just let it go. If they don’t want to sell, have a nice day.

Jack:                      Right.

Jill:                          That’s fine.

Jack:                      But I’m gonna respectfully ask that you stop harassing my staff.

Jill:                          Yeah.

Jack:                      Then I hang up the phone, and that’s what I say to myself. Or I’m gonna crawl though that phone.

Jill:                          That’s funny. That’s funny.

Jack:                      This is fun talking about stuff like this Jill.

Jill:                          I know, this is good.

Jack:                      Nobody’s left listening, but it’s fun for us.

Jill:                          That’s okay, it is good.

Jack:                      Join us for the next episode, where we discuss lessons from data obsessed people like me.

Jill:                          And we answer Luke Harris’s question about HOA fees.

Jack:                      You are not alone in your real estate ambition. Good show Jill. Good for us anyway.

Jill:                          Oh that was therapy.

Jack:                      See how the numbers come back.

Jill:                          Yeah.

Jack:                      Probably lost half of our audience.

Jill:                          That’s true, that was … We’re gonna turn into a psychology something. It’s not fireside chat. I’m trying to think what this is called. Psychology 101, with Jack and Jill. I don’t know. That’s so silly. Hey, you like our show? At least the other ones?

Jack:                      You like our show, that’s your problem.

Jill:                          That’s your problem … Hate our show?

Jack:                      That’s my problem.

Jill:                          Either way, subscribe. You’ll be entertained, and rate us on iTunes, or wherever you are listening.

Jack:                       Information and inspiration to buy under valued property.


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